Don't misunderstand. I'm perfectly, wonderfully content with my clan. But, for the first time in quite a while, I actually felt a loss. A loss that my body will never experience the growth of life again. A loss that I'll never nourish another child from this aging body. I don't particularly want to be pregnant again, especially at my age, or even have another baby in the house. Maybe the reality that my kids are growing up caused this passing sadness. Maybe it is just a reminder of the children I've lost over the years: Ashton, Grace, Ben, and Rachel. Maybe I'll always feel this way until my life is over.
But, soon chaos will ensue our lives once again. The sadness will fade into the background until another reminder comes my way. Life is good. It is such a precious gift from God.
5 kind words:
I'm so sorry for your losses! GOD is so good to bring peace and healing! What a precious photo of you and Eva!
I think that I feel exactly the same way. We also lost four babies...sadness comes at unexpected moments.
I think I will always feel that way, honestly. I love having a little one around.
i have had similar twinges....i wonder if they will ever go away!?
such a pretty photo of 2 pretty girls!
I've thought that as well, and since we have some pretty major infertility issues to deal with to even TRY for another biological (and quite honestly if we did it would require more expense than another China adoption)...well, it's TOUGH to know you are done adding to your family. But, yet, in a way, there are good feelings with it as well.
{HUG} I'm so very sorry for your losses...it's tough sometimes and it's hard when the pain of those losses comes back unexpectedly.
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